You Remind Me of True Love
by Write-To-You
Summary: A series of drabbles set in a universe where Kylo Ren is redeemed, accepted and well, and he, Rey, Finn and Poe are friends living together on the Rebel base. (All Reylo, with features from Finn, Poe, and maybe others. Title from Reylo's shipping song, 'Nowhere')
1. Cold Hands

**Author's Note: Never never neverrrrr excepted to do a drabble series for any ship other than one from a CW show. Like seriously- that has actually never happened before. Which is crazy. **

**FITTING THAT REYLO IS THE FIRST! I'm sure that, had I watched the OG Star Wars as they came out as a teenager, I would have felt the same way about Han and Leia, shipping wise. But I didn't, and so it's all so new and exciting to feel so strongly about such a beautiful (AND CANNON WHAAAT?!) Star Wars ship!**

_Summary: Ben has cold hands and Rey really just needs to remedy that._

When they were all on Csilla, Rey got it.

Because the planet was _freezing_. It may just have been that Rey had grown up on a planet that was usually unbearably hot, but she was almost constantly cold on Csilla. She wore at least three layers on her top and bottom at any given day, and basically slept with her hat on. And still, she was cold.

So Rey understood why Ben's fingers felt like _actual icicles_ when he touched her. Not that that happened very often, but there had been that one time in the corridor when she had been walking and reading and he had tugged her out of the way of a transport load. She had slipped a little on the icy floor and caught herself with the Force, but Ben had pulled her into his chest regardless.

Rey probably could have spent all day just gazing up into his eyes, but then his hand floated to her cheek and she squealed because it was _freezing_.

And then there was that other time that they'd been standing next to each other for a mission briefing. Rey's hand and bumped sideways a little, unintentionally, and Ben's fingers were suddenly pressed against her own. She had pulled away hurriedly, her cheeks heating so much that she was almost tempted to pull of her hat, but her hand had been there long enough to feel how frigid his fingers were.

So, again. On Scilla, Rey got it. But on _Devaron_? Devaron, that is nearly as hot as Rey's home planet, where the humidity makes her sweat almost constantly and her hair frizz out excessively on either side of her head?

Ben's hands should _not_ be cold.

Rey was in her quarters one morning when Ben walked in unannounced. She looked around, smiling over at him, and he almost immediately started laughing.

"What?" Rey demanded, trying not to sound offended. Part of her was just glad to hear Ben laugh, but the other part was a little hurt that that had been his first reaction upon seeing her.

"Sorry," Ben said immediately, trying to get his humor under control. "Sorry. You just... sunblock? Really? After living on Jakku and being in the sun every single day?"

Rey scoffed, embarrassed. "Well, in case you didn't know, Jakku's sun is actually a ways away from the planet. Our atmosphere just captures a lot of the rays, which is why it's so hot. Devaron's sun, on the other hand, is quite close. So..." She held up her small tub of thick white sunscreen. "Sunblock."

"It's cloudy out," Ben replied, shaking his head.

"Which actually makes sun damage even worse," Rey informed him, and went back to slathering sunblock on her bare arms. She had gotten pale after Csilla, and she hoped that the sunblock wouldn't stop her from getting some of the normal color into her skin.

"Here," Ben said with a sigh, moving over to her side. "You really didn't... rub it in up here."

Rey raised her eyebrow as he reached up to try and gently smudge the sunblock more thoroughly into her face. For a second she leaned into the touch, but then the heat receptors on her face registered and she yanked her head back with a yelp. "Ben!"

"What?" he asked, pulling his hand back sharply. "What did I do?"

"How are your hands_ still_ freezing?" Rey asked, reaching out and pulling his hand into her own. "It's, like, 90 degrees here and it's not much cooler on base. Are you seriously _cold_?"

Ben pulled away, shifting awkwardly as he rubbed his hands together. "Uh... sorry?" he tried, squinting at her slightly.

She _had_ sounded pretty accusatory, which hadn't been her intention. "Come here," Rey urged, reaching for his hands again. She stepped a little closer and tucked his hands into a warm spot between the underside of her chin and her collarbone. The cold make her shudder at first, but she got used to it quickly. Honestly, with the heat of Devaron, it actually wasn't the worst thing in the world. "I wasn't... that wasn't a problem, I was just surprised."

"I have bad circulation," Ben grumbled wish a shrug. "I really don't notice it; it's not that big of a deal."

"So your hands are cold like this _all _the time?" Rey asked disbelievingly. She hadn't ever had much experience with being cold, but the idea of your fingers being constantly freezing sounded like a strange form of torture to her.

Ben shrugged again. "Yes...?" he said uncertainly. "I mean, not _all_ the time. Most of the time."

He pulled back again, drawing his hands away from the now-cool skin of her throat. "I don't want to make you cold."

"It's boiling out here. I don't mind," Rey replied, waving him off. But she let him drop his hands back to his sides, fingers curled into fists.

Why was this bothering her so much? It was more than that his hands were cold. Was it because he hadn't told her? But who just _told_ someone about their cold hands?

Rey shook herself a little and went back to rubbing in her sunblock. "I'll be ready to go in a few minutes," she told Ben, unsure of what else to say.

A few days later, Rey was standing outside of Ben's quarters. She knocked on the door and it slid open almost immediately, revealing Ben on the other side. "Hello," he said, looking at her in question.

Rey reached out and pushed a small package into his hands. "I got you something," she said.

Ben's eyebrows furrowed a little and he quickly opened up the gift. "Uh... thank you?" he said uncertainly, looking down at the multitude of small packets that had been inside the package.

"They're hand warmers," Rey explained quickly. "You open them and give them a few seconds and they get warm. They last for, like, twelve hours so I figured you could put them in your pockets or something and then when your hands are cold you could use them to warm them up."

She realized she was rambling a little and cut herself off. Ben looked down at the hand warmers again and smiled a little, the confusion finally leaving his face. "Oh. Thank you." He opened up one of the packets and the tiny heat sacks disappeared in his large hands.

"Also," Rey pressed on. "I wanted to say I'm sorry. When I got... upset, I guess, about the fact that you have cold hands... it wasn't because you'd never told me. It was because I didn't know."

"Isn't that the same thing?" Ben asked.

"Not exactly." Rey reached forward and took his hands in hers. The hand warmers were almost unbearably hot against her palms but she would deal with it. She pulled his hands up and tucked them under her chin again. "If I had touched your hands more, I would have known. I think I was just upset because it made me realize that I- I want your cold hands. I want to hold them, and have them like this..." She positioned his hands so they were cupping her cheeks. "Or have them on my waist or rubbing my back when we hug. And I- I didn't know your hands were constantly cold because I.. didn't know how they felt at all."

Ben gently pulled his hands away from her cheeks, flipping them over so the back rested against her face. Rey leaned into the touch a little, regardless of the shiver that was sent down her spine, and smiled at him. "Does that make sense?"

"Yes," Ben said softly. "Anytime you'd like to hold my hand, Rey... you can."

"Okay," Rey whispered, feeling a flurry of butterflies in her stomach at the idea. "Sounds like a plan."

Needless to say, they left Ben's quarters holding hands. At this rate, he might not even need the hand warmers.

**Author's Note: LOLLLL I got to the linebreak and I was like... uhhhh okay this whole Ben-having-cold-hands thing needs to have a point and not just be him having cold hands... so this is what we ended up with XD**

**I hope you enjoyed! I don't know how all of us fanfiction writers can manage to get Ben even a little bit in character... is there ever a part in the movies where he's acting, like, awkward or adorkable or serious or rule-abiding? Because I can clearly picture him being like that in my head and Idk where I'm getting it from XD**

**Prompt me, if you want!**


	2. Call Me If You Need Me

**Author's Note: Hehehehehe GUESS WHO REMEMBERED THAT SHE WROTE THIS AND NEVER POSTED IT?! MEEEE ****_don't kill me please-_**

_Summary: Ben is sick but he tries to get through the day anyway. It doesn't exactly go well. _

"Man, you look awful," Finn said with a snort as he and Poe joined Ben in the hallway headed to the mess hall.

"He's not wrong," Poe agreed.

Ben rolled his eyes. In all honesty, he felt about as awful as he had seen himself look in the mirror that morning. But it was just a stupid cold; it might have even been allergies. And Ben was planning on dealing with it in the same way he'd been dealing with feeling awful for the past decade: By completely ignoring it.

"Thanks," he replied sarcastically, rolling his tired eyes. The three of them walked into the dining area, the smell of fried food hitting them even this early in the morning. The scent usually made Ben's stomach growl eagerly, but today he could barely stand it. He didn't feel sick, exactly, but the idea of putting anything fake and manufactured in his mouth made him cringe.

Poe and Finn headed to the hot lunch line to load up on breakfast like they always did. Ben debated following them, to keep up appearance, but he was honestly just tired. He wandered over to a table, grabbing an piece of fruit along the way, and sat slowly down on the one of the long benches. Finn and Poe found him a few minutes later, and Finn raised his eyebrow. "Dude. An fruit? For breakfast?"

Ben just looked at him with his patented dead-eyed stare and began to pick at the thick peel of his fruit. He tentatively put the first piece on his tongue and swallowed it. The acidity made his throat burn and he coughed a little, putting the fruit back down on his plate.

"Are you _sure_ you're alright?" Poe asked, reaching across the table and nudging Ben in the shoulder. "You're always pale, but you're basically a ghost today."

"I'm fine," Ben grumbled, ripping up the peel that was laying in his plate.

"Oh, dude," Finn spoke up after a few seconds of inhaling his breakfast egg dish. "I bumped into Rey before breakfast and she said that after you're finished to meet her in the woods because she wants to train or something."

Ben barely resisted a groan. Not only would Rey take one look at him and his Force signature and realize that something was up, but even if she somehow _didn't_... in short, Ben could barely keep up with Rey on normal days, much less when he was feeling like this.

"But seriously, if she knew you were sick I'm sure she'd let you off the hook," Finn was saying when Ben tuned back into the conversation.

Ben glared darkly at him. "I'm not sick," he growled. Then he stood up, ready to face whatever he was going to have to with Rey.

Almost immediately, vertigo slapped him in the face. It took every ounce of Ben's self control (along with a fair amount of his Force abilities) he took himself upright.

"Hey," Poe said, nodding a chin at him. He kept his voice light, but there was a furrow between his eyebrows that belied his concern. "Man, why don't you just take the day off? One day."

"I'm-" Ben's voice caught and he had to stop speaking to avoid breaking into a coughing fit. He turned and stepped over the bench instead, walking rapidly out of the mess hall.

Ben walked slowly to the forest at the side of the Rebel Base. The area was Rey's favorite place to train, whether she was meditating or practicing with Force or training with Ben, and so he knew exactly where to go. He was unsurprised to find Rey sitting crosslegged, floating couple solid feet in the air. She was rotating slowly, her eyes shut.

"Hi," Ben spoke up, standing in his usually gangly way in front of Rey.

She did a graceful backflip and landed soundlessly on the ground facing him. "Hey, Ben." Then she frowned, finally opening up her eyes and taking a good look at him. "You alright?"

"Fine," Ben grumbled. He knew he looked bad, but he really wished people would stop asking him that.

Rey squinted suspiciously at him, then her face smoothed out. "Okay," she said simply, and in the next second her lightsaber was flying into her hand from who knew where. Ben startled, though he should have seen the move coming (it was one of Rey's favorites), and was barely able to get his own lightsaber in his hand in time to block Rey's strike.

Their sabers clashed with a hiss. Ben felt off-balanced and like he'd already expended all of his energy. His arms trembled and he quickly shoved Rey's lightsaber away so he could take a few steps back.

Rey circled him, face creased thoughtfully. He felt through their Force-bond that she was about to attack and quickly dove to the left. But he'd gotten his footing all wrong and he tripped, stumbling over his boots. His hand shot out and he used the Force to stop his fall and push himself back to his feet.

Ben struck wildly, trying to end the fight as quickly as possible. Rey easily reflected the blow and delivered two quick slashes of her own.

They were easy parries, and Ben should have been able to stop them with his own saber. But his head was suddenly spinning, the flash of Rey's lightsaber making his gaze blur. He stumbled backward and the tip of Rey's weapon caught the edge of his arm.

"Oh Force, Ben, I'm so sorry," Rey gasped, turning off her blade and running over to Ben's side. He was leaning heavily on a tree, breath coming in pants as he arm burned.

"It's fine," Ben muttered through gritted teeth as Rey reached for his arm. "Just a graze."

"I went too hard," Rey replied, the self-hate evident in her tone. "I just- you're usually so on your game and you clearly _aren't_ today. I should have been respectful of that but I was annoyed that you wouldn't tell me what was wrong, so I took advantage of it instead. Here." She had put her hand on his arm and shut her eyes. Slowly but surely, the intense pain in Ben's arm began to recede. The skin merged itself back together and became smooth again.

"You're going to run out of Life-Force eventually," Ben said, trying unsuccessfully to pull his now-healed arm away.

Rey wasn't looking at him, instead putting her fingers against his forearm. In a move so quick it surprised him, she lifted her hand and brushed back his hair to place it against his forehead. Ben unconsciously leaned into the touch, before he remembered what he was doing and took a few quick steps backwards.

"You're sick," Rey realized. "You have a fever."

"No I don't," Ben grumbled, wishing he sounded less like a petulant little kid. "I am merely overheated from our fight."

"Right..." Rey said slowly, raising her eyebrows. "Fine. Then let's get back to our bond-training from yesterday."

For the second time that day, Ben physically resisted the urge to groan. He and Rey had been working on merging their powers more fully together in Force to try and do things no Jedi had ever attempted before. Things like growing a full tree from a sapling in under three hours. In other words, things that took intense concentration and power-of-mind, which were both things Ben did _not_ have at the moment.

Glaring halfheartedly at Rey, because he knew she was just doing this to prove that he was sick, Ben took a seat crosslegged on the forest floor facing her. Rey smiling calmly back at him, not revealing anything in her expression, and held out her hands. Ben places his fingertips lightly on her palms, and they both shut their eyes.

Immediately, Ben could feel Rey's Force-presence relaxing as she slipped into her meditative stage. He, on the other hand, was suddenly _way_ too aware of everything going on in his body. He felt a trickle of sweat roll down his back, and the damp from the ground underneath him caused a shiver to shake his entire upper body. His throat burned and he needed to cough, but he was _Ben Solo, dang it_, and he would not give you.

Rey cracked an eye open. "You gonna join me?" she asked, her voice teasing.

"Working on it," Ben growled, not opening his own eyes. He took a deep breath and repositioned on the ground, trying to focus. Still, his sense of body wouldn't leave him and he couldn't tap into a meditation, no matter how hard he tried.

Rey opened both eyes this time. "Ben-"

"I- I can't, okay?" Ben suddenly exploded, pulling his hands from hers. Their connection was broken with a jerk and Ben hunched over. He hadn't realized how much unwell Rey had been taken from him until she was gone, and now it all came rushing back like a x-wing to bowl him over.

"Hey," Rey murmured, crawling over to him. She pushed a shock of lank, sweat-soaked hair behind his ear and felt his forehead. "Ben..."

"_What_?" he snapped, not looking at her. "Nice job, Rey, you did it. I'm sick. Happy now?"

"Of course I'm not-" Rey broke off in frustration. "I don't _want_ you to be sick, Ben, that's ridiculous. I just... want you to trust me enough to tell me when you are."

He shivered again and her face went soft. Before Ben could stop her, Rey had pulled off her own cloak and draped it around his shoulders. Their size difference was pretty expansive, but the cloak was large enough to cover Ben's back. He swallowed and looked up at her. "Fine," he murmured. "Rey, I am unwell and am requesting a day off of training."

She gave him an exasperated smile. "Of course. Now come on, let's get you to a medical droid."

Ben felt a surge of panic. He _hated_ medical droids. They reminded him much too vividly of the many hours he'd had to spend with them in the First Order when his injuries were being patched up. In truth, anything as cold and metallic and stiff as the medical droids reminded him of the First Order.

"No," he said, maybe a little too vehemently. "No, I'll just return to my quarters to rest."

Rey looked dubious. "But-"

"Rey," Ben said again, looking at her imploringly.

"Fine." Rey let out a sigh and grasped at his arm, beginning to lug him to his feet. "Come on, let's get you up."

Ben allowed her to drag him upright, groaning a little as all the blood rushed from his head. He staggered, and immediately felt Rey's warm force-presence pressed into the side that she wasn't on, keeping him on his feet. "Thank you," he remembered to say after a moment as they walked slowly through the woods. "I'm... not used to this. To being... looked after."

"Me either," Rey said softly, pressing her lips to his cheek. "But anytime you need it, I don't mind."

He nodded, wanting to tell her that the feeling was mutual but not quite sure how. They made it back to his quarters without incident, and when they walked in Ben finally let the cough that had been building in his chest get out. Once he started, though, he couldn't seem to stop, and found himself leaning against the wall unable to catch his breath.

"Here," Rey murmured, and she pushed something into the hand that wasn't covering his mouth. Ben sipped gratefully at the water, forcing himself not to choke as he tried to swallow and cough at the same time.

The water helped and Ben let out a deep sigh, his shoulders dropping. "You should get some rest," Rey said, putting her small, warm hand on Ben's shoulder.

He glanced down at himself, taking in the heavy duty boots, black suit, and dark robes he was wearing. Really, with the amount of layers he had on, it was a wonder that he was still managing to be cold. "I should, uhh, change. First."

Rey's eyes went wide and all of the sudden her cheeks got very red. "Oh!" she cried. "Oh, right, yes. Duh, stupid me. I'll just, umm..." She coughed and quickly spun around so her back was to Ben, rocking back and forth on her toes awkwardly.

Ben allowed himself a faint smile at her back and slowly changed into his night clothes, discarding the outfit he had forced himself into only a couple hours before on a chair beside his sleep pod. When he had finished he cleared his throat. "I'm.. uh... I'm done."

"Oh," Rey said again, turning back around. Whether she was still blushing from earlier or she'd started again, her face was still incredibly red. "Okay."

They looked at each other, before Ben cleared his throat again and hesitantly got into his sleep pod. Rey walked over and brushed his hair back from his face, helping him to pull up his covers so he was completely cocooned in blankets. Then she leaned down at kissed his forehead. "Have a good sleep, Ben. Let me know if you need anything."

He nodded slowly, his eyelids beginning to slip down his face. Through bleary, half-dark vision, Ben watched Rey silently back out of his quarters and shut the door behind him.

Then he was asleep.

Rey knew the minute Ben fell asleep, because the tenuous hold he'd had on keeping their bond shut fell apart, and she was suddenly hit with the full force of the achy exhaustion he was experiencing. Rey stumbled a little, dizzy, before taking a steadying breath and clearing her head enough to put the parts of Ben's consciousness that had leaked into her own mind into a little box. She left the lid off, though, wanting to know the minute he needed her.

She wasn't exactly sure what to do now. Ben was sleeping, and hovering would probably just make him uncomfortable. She didn't like to leave him, but she supposed that she had work to do today, and she might as well do it.

Ben woke up unsure if he was still dreaming. Or maybe it was that he was unsure if he hadn't already been awake. He had dreamed a lot of things, spanning from getting up to get a glass of water to leaping off a cliff into a giant mirage of Snoke with a rainbow lightsaber held in his hands.

Ben swallowed, his throat thick and dry, and tried to sit up. At some point during his sleep, he had tossed and turned so much that the blankets around him were twisted into what looked like incredibly thick ropes. He kicked them off his feet and pushed himself into a seated position. There was something he had to do, right? Training. With Rey.

Right? Ben shook himself a little, unable to remember. He was pretty sure he had overslept for something, and it was probably training. Hopefully Rey wouldn't be too mad.

Ben got out of bed and slowly pulled his boots onto his feet. They felt much heavier than usual, like someone had come in while he was asleep and stuck thin stones into the soles. He threw on his cloak, not bothering to change the majority of his outfit, and headed out the door.

Maybe he would stop for some water before heading to training. There would be water in the mess hall, right? Had he had breakfast yet?

As he changed direction away from the woods to the dining area, Ben passed a group of Rebels walking down the hallway. His head turned to follow their movements, which seemed to be in slow motion, and the next thing he knew his toes were catching on the edge of a crate loaded for transport. He and the crate were suddenly falling together, crashing headlong onto the rough stone floor.

Ben rolled onto his back blearily, hearing fuzzy voices calling something and maybe even a little bit of laughter. Now that he thought about it, the fact that he'd just tripped over a crate _was_ pretty funny, and a deep chuckle rose up from his chest.

But the laugh transformed just before it reached the surface and all at once Ben was coughing uncontrollably. His elbow slammed into the ground and he struggled to push himself off his back, unable to get enough air into his lungs. His ears rang, and something in his head pounded from where he'd hit it after his fall.

"Ben!" someone yelled, the voice right above him. Ben breathed in deeply and the scent of pine trees and burning kyber crystals filled his senses. Something buzzed at the back of his head, but it wasn't from the fall this time; it was pleasant and soothing, and worried.

A hand landed on his cheek, and Ben flinched a little in surprise. He squeezed his eyes tightly together and then opened them again, and his vision was a little clearer. Rey's face swam above his own, her eyes dark and serious.

"Hi..." Ben mumbled, smiling dopily at her. The ever-present frizz at the sides of her face had been curled by the humidity, and at such a close range Ben could see the sheer amount of tiny, pale freckles she had all across her makeup-less cheeks and nose. "So beautiful," he murmured, trying to reach up and touch her face. His aim was off, though, and his hand smacked into her nose.

Rey recoiled a little, a surprised laugh leaping from her mouth. She caught his hand and quickly pressed her lips to it. "Okay, Mr. Smooth, just lie still for a second."

Ben snorted a little at the nickname, watching Rey idly as she straightened up a little. He hadn't realized he'd been half-lying on the crate he'd fallen over until Rey dragged it out of the way and all of him rested on the floor. Ben shivered as the cold from the stone leaked through his thin night clothes.

"Okay, here we go," Rey muttered, putting her hand on Ben's chest. She stood up and Ben felt the air around him firming as he rose with her, like his chest was connected to her fingertips. Ben felt the bottoms of his feet land steadily on the floor, but just before his knees could give out Rey slipped under one of his arms and lead him to lean against her.

"Alright, I got you," Rey murmured in his ear, positioning him against her shoulder. "Why were you out of bed, Ben?"

Ben frowned a little as they started walking, barely registering the multiple clumps of people hanging around the edges of the hallway and watching him and Rey with wide eyes. Why had he gotten out of bed again? Or, right. "Training," he said, tripping a little on the edge of the stone floor and forcing Rey to stumble with them until she caught them with the Force. She was starting to get out of breath, and he realized how heavy he must be to her. "I had... training."

Was talking always this tiring? A small cough pushed its way out of Ben's mouth and he raised his arm halfheartedly to catch the germs.

"We already did our training," Rey told him gently. "So you don't have to worry about that anymore, okay? All you need to do is sleep."

Now that she said it, Ben _did_ seem to remember heading into the woods that morning and getting injured in a lightsaber battle. He looked down at his arm curiously, but found the skin to be smooth. Maybe that had been a dream, then.

They had reached his quarters again and Ben heard Rey slide open the door. His eyelids were starting to droop and he let out a sigh of relief when he saw his sleep pod in the corner. Rey helped him over and he started to arrange the tangled sheets around himself as best he could, already mostly asleep.

"Here, hang on, hang on." Rey reaching down and tugged off his boots, before helping him out of his cloak and putting them to the side. She fiddled with the blankets and managed to straighten them out, pulling them over Ben for what he was pretty sure was the second time today. "I'm just going to hang out in here, okay?" Rey said, giving Ben a serious look. "I don't want you trying to get up again. I'm really glad I felt you moving or I don't know where you would have ended up."

"The woods," Ben explained. His jaw was tired and he had to take a break before speaking again. "Training."

"Of course," Rey agreed easily, nodding at him. She cleared off the clothes from Ben's chair and sat down, curling her legs up beneath her. "Go to sleep okay?"

Or, maybe that was what she'd said, because Ben was already asleep again.

Rey dozed off a little bit herself. She kept the back of her mind open, though, and so she could start to feel when Ben's fever began to break. He became restless and turned over a few times, trying to rid himself of his covers as his temperature spiked. Now fully awake and unsure of what else to do, Rey ran to get some water from the hallway's bathroom and put it on a towel before bringing it back to Ben. It didn't stay cool very long, but she thought the pained furrow between his eyebrows eased a little when she put the cloth on his forehead.

When Ben woke up again he was soaked through with sweat and felt considerably more lucid. He cleared his throat a few times to rid it of the gunk and the tickle and looked around him. The alarm droid on his table showed him that it was almost midnight. Rey was slumped in her chair, fast asleep, with a half-dry cloth held loosely in her hands.

Ben stretched and winced a little as a spot on his head throbbed. He reached up and rubbed it and found a lump through his hair. When had that happened? He could remember getting hit with Rey's lightsaber in the woods, but she'd healed that injury that afternoon. How had he somehow bumped his head without realizing it?

"You tripped over a crate," Rey said and he realized with a start that she'd woken up. She let out a yawn and rubbed her eyes with the back of her hand, slowly sitting up. "You were really feverish a few hours ago and wandered out of here, and ended up tripping over a transportation crate in the hallway and hitting your head."

"I don't remember any of that," Ben mumbled, shaking his head slowly. "How long have I been asleep?"

"A couple hours, maybe?" Rey guessed. "Your fever broke a little bit ago so I decided to try and get some rest. How're you feeling?"

"Considerably better," Ben admitted. He pushed himself up into a seated position, wishing that the base kept the shower facilities open at night so he could go clean up. "Uh... thank you. For looking after me. I must admit that I'm... not used to people caring when I'm unwell."

Rey's head tilted a little and she gave him an unreadable look before walking over to sit at the edge of his bed. "Just tell me next time, okay?" she murmured, pushing his sweaty hair back from his face and tucking it behind his ear before running her hand down his arm. Ben caught the hand and held it in his own. "I don't want to have to push you to your breaking point through the Force just for you to tell me what's wrong, Ben. Wouldn't it have been so much easier if you'd just said you were sick this morning and let me take care of you?"

Ben glanced down. "Rey, I don't think you quite understand," he murmured, one large thumb stroking over her hand. "If you get sick when you're in the First Order, you push through and you don't say a word or people make things even worse for you. I'm not used- I not used to _this_." He gestured between the two of them. "To someone waning to care for me like you do."

Rey reached up her free hand and wiped under his eyes, her finger catching a tear that had just starting rolling down Ben's cheek. She wasn't used to seeing him cry (it was usually the other way around), but Rey liked the show of vulnerability. "I do understand," she countered. "You think it was a walk in the park for me to show I was sick when I was a Scavenger? You show weakness, you get your stuff stolen, which means no food tonight."

She pulled back and little and put her hand on top of his, so all of their fingers were locked together and resting on Ben's thigh. "The thing is, both of us need to get used to not being alone anymore. We have the Rebels, and we have each other. So no more hiding when we're sick or hurting or upset, okay?"

"Okay," Ben breathed, and leaned forward to rest his head against hers.

Rey took in a slow, calming breath, sending those same emotions through the bond to him, and then pulled back. "I'm going to go get some real rest, alright?" she told him, standing up from his sleep pod. "I'll come check on you tomorrow. Take another day off, just in case."

"Yes ma'am," Ben replied with a faint, teasing smile.

She kissed him on the forehead one last time and squeezed his hand. "And seriously, Ben. Tell me if you need something."

Ben nodded, watching her head toward the door. "I will."

**Author's Note: Ok ok I'm so sorrry but that might be the last one for awhile because I'm no longer inspired to write them D: I need to watch the movie again! **


	3. Competition

**Author's Note: Guess what just got put on Disney+... STAR WARS THE RISE OF SKYWALKER MUAHAHA!**

**So I'm back. Hellooooo everybody :D **

_Summary: Ben really, _really_ likes Rey, but he's worried there's going to be some problems with Finn and Poe and he's not exactly sure what to do about it._

It wasn't as if Ben didn't understand. Poe and Finn, objectively speaking, were two very attractive men, and Rey would have to be blind not to see that.

Still, whenever he saw the three of them together, or worse, in pairs, it made him feel irritated. Jealous. Humble, but not in a good way. Lowly?

Because Finn and Poe could make Rey laugh. They teased her, and some might even say flirted with her. They were playful and funny and Rey really _liked_ them. They were good men, and it made Ben feel...

Inferior. That was the word. Finn and Poe made him feel inferior, and he wasn't sure what to do about it.

Take right now. They were all in the dining hall, but Ben was at a table with a bowl of cornmeal in front of him, and Poe, Finn and Rey were standing in the breakfast line laughing at a story Poe was telling. With utmost casualness, Finn slung his arm around Rey's shoulders and she leaned into him, wrinkling her nose in that adorable way she always did. Poe said something to her and she laughed outright again, slapping him in the shoulder.

There was the sound of a chair scraping back against the cement and Ben jumped, embarrassed at being caught staring at the three of them. Leia, his mother, slowly seated herself at the table and raised an eyebrow.

"What?" he grumbled, quickly turning himself back to his breakfast and stabbing his spoon into the thick cornmeal sludge.

"You tell me," Leia rejoined with a snort. "From an outsiders perspective it looks like you're in love with all three of them."

Ben felt his cheeks heat. "Don't be ridiculous," he muttered.

"Obviously _I_ don't think that- I know who you're really looking at." Leia rolled her eyes. "But you might want to check that staring if you don't want someone _else_ getting the wrong idea."

"It's not as if I'm in control over it," Ben huffed. "I see them together and it's like I can't look away. I want to; trust me. But I... can't."

"Love is a fickle thing," Leia sighed. "Do you know how many times I tried to throw everything I had with your father away? So many times. Way too many for what we had to be considered a healthy relationship." She smiled wryly. "You want to walk away, but you can't. Because love keeps you from moving."

"It's not- I don't-" Ben smooshed his cornmeal with an epic squelching sound. This stuff was disgusting- why had he gotten it in the first place? He could have been over by the hot food line, with Poe and Finn and Rey.

And being an awkward fourth wheel. Because that's how it was with them.

"The bond between the three of them, regardless of the emotion causing it, is strong," Leia said, reaching out to put her hand gently on Ben's wrist. "But Ben, the answer isn't to break what they have. The answer is to add another piece to it."

"Don't you think I've tried?" Ben asked desperately. "I- I walk over to talk with them and I can't think of a single thing to say. When I'm alone with Rey it's- it's different. We can always discuss the Force or the Jedi Order or- or Luke Skywalker, if there's absolutely nothing else. I don't feel like I'm struggling to find the right words to... to fit in."

Leia let out a laugh and Ben looked at her, affronted. She sighed at his glance, patting his wrist. "Sometimes I forget that you were raised rather... unconventionally," she said with a faint smile. "Most people your age have had to struggle with being left out for all of their teenaged years. You... you were _always_ the center of attention. The chosen child of Han Solo and Princess Leia. I apologize for that."

"You make all of this sound so childish," Ben mumbled, pulling his hand away from hers and clenching his fists. He had the urge to pick up his bowl and smash it on the ground but that would _actually_ be childish so he refrained.

"Not childish," Leia countered. "Just something that children are forced to grapple with. It's just coming a bit... late for you."

"Great," Ben sighed. "So what do you suggest I do?"

Leia looked at him searchingly, and then over at Finn, Poe and Rey. Against his better judgement, Ben looked in that direction too, and immediately noticed how traditionally 'swoony' Poe's hair looked and how well Rey and Finn's heights complimented each others. How could he compete with that? He was bulky and had a giant nose and his hair never seemed to cooperate-

"First off," Leia finally answered, interrupting his thoughts. "You can stop tearing yourself down by comparing yourself to those other two men. Not only is it unhealthy, but it will lead to you looking for every last flaw in their characters, trying to make them seem worse than you so you can feel better."

Chagrined, Ben looked back at his hands. They may not have been the most lovely things in the world, but they were safer than gazing at the three by the lunch line.

"Secondly," Leia went on. "You can make an effort. Have you tried speaking with them today? Or, I don't know... asking Rey on a date?"

Ben looked up, shocked. "Asking- are you serious? Rey would never agree to go on a date with me."

Leia gazed at him, deadpan. "_Sure_ she wouldn't," she said sarcastically. "Here's a thought- Why don't you let her give you that answer herself instead of just _assuming_ what she wants? Rule one of being a good man: _Never_ assume what a woman wants."

Ben made a face. "So, I should stand up and walk over to them and just... ask Rey on a date? In the middle of the dining hall?"

"I didn't mean _now_," Leia groaned. "Oh my boy, you are truly impossible. Why don't you start with going over and saying good morning?"

"Fine," Ben grumbled, standing and awkward walking around his chair. He looked down at his bowl. "Should I bring my cereal?"

Leia sighed, looking at him with the sort of expression you'd see on someone who truly thought their subject was a lost cause. "The cereal can stay here. I'll... look after it for you."

Making another face, Ben slowly trudged towards Poe, Finn and Rey. They caught sight of him when he was about two yards away and Rey's face lit up in a smile. "Ben!" she called, waving him over. "Good morning."

"Good morning," he replied stiffly, nodding at Finn and Poe. "I... trust you all slept well."

"Man, I had this dream-" Poe started.

"Yeah, we heard it already," Finn interrupted with a roll of his eyes.

"Yeah, well _he hasn't_," Poe reminded him, giving him a peeved stare. "Anyway, I had this dream that we were on Endor, right? And the Ewoks were holding an awards ceremony, and they had all of these different honors. And Finn, Rey, you and I were just-"

"I was in your dream?" Ben interrupted, thrown for a loop.

"It's not nearly as romantic as it sounds," Poe rejoined, smirking. "But yeah, you were there. Anyway, the four of us were at this awards ceremony, and they kept calling the medals and I swear they gave _every single one of them_ to General Hux."

Ben was so surprised he let out a bark of a laugh. "General Hux?"

"General Hux," Poe confirmed, grinning that his story had been found humorous.

Rey snorted with laughter, shaking her head. "Can I just mention how weird it was that you were dreaming about _General Hux_?" she pointed out, reaching up to brush her hair out of her face. "Of all the people in the galaxy, your subconscious picks _him_."

"They say a dream reveals what's truly on your mind..." Finn teased, reaching out to punch Poe in the shoulder.

"Oh yeah?" Poe shot back. "Well then, I'll remind you that you had a dream about _Leia_ a few days ago."

Rey caught sight of Ben's face and let out another laugh. "It wasn't nearly as wrong as Poe just made it sound," she reassured him, putting a hand on his arm.

See, this was the other problem with spending time with Rey, Finn and Poe. Whenever Rey touched him or, honestly? looked at him, all Ben could manage was an unintelligible: "Guhhh..."

"Dang it, Rey, you broke him again," Finn said, mock-disapproving as he shook his head at her.

Rey winced and patted Ben's arm before letting her hand fall. "Sorry."

"It's... okay?" Ben asked dumbly.

Poe glanced at his watch. "We should go find a seat and eat," he suggested, starting to head towards the mass of tables in the middle of the room. Finn and Rey nodded, trailing after him.

Rey turned around a couple steps in and smiled at Ben. "You coming?" she asked.

She was looking at him again. Maybe it'd be easier to speak if that wasn't happening. Ben switched his gaze to the back of a random admiral's head. "Uh, yeah. I just... need to grab something."

He hurried back to his original table to find Leia eating his abandoned cornmeal. "This really _is_ bad," she commented as she handed him back his bowl.

"I know," Ben replied, laughing a little.

"I take it it went well?"

"Uh, yeah." Ben shot a glance over towards Finn, Poe and Rey, who were taking seats at another table. "I'm gonna go... I'm gonna go over there. Eat breakfast with them." He walked a few steps in that direction before turning around and facing Leia again. "Thanks, mom."

She waved him off, and he went to sit with his friends.

**Author's Note: Haha, that turned into more of a bb!Ben struggles with being social than bb!Ben is jealous, but hey... nothing like wise Leia to redeem an off-track story XD**


End file.
